


Little Dolly

by BatmanJoker0801



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Baby, Father-Son Relationship, Gen, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, adorablebutcrazy!joker, baby!joker, confused Bruce, doll!joker, grandpa alfred
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-08
Updated: 2016-03-13
Packaged: 2018-05-25 13:16:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6196457
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BatmanJoker0801/pseuds/BatmanJoker0801
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Joker never become one of  Batman's rogue. He become his kid (kinda) instead. Thankfully, Bruce got Alfred to help</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Head

**Author's Note:**

> Please R&R! Enjoy!

Little Dolly

 

Chapter 1:Head

There is something strange with them small porcelain dolls sitting in their glass cases on many shelves in his great grandfather’ study. His great grandfather was a doll collector. He also got collections of stuffed ones but not as much as the porcelains or woods or any other materials you can make a doll of. He even have a voodoo doll for Christ’ sake. The real deal.

So it wasn’t a surprise that he got the house, with rooms full of dolls, each with their own category; the house isn’t even a house anymore but a museum for these toy. The owner; Abraham Wayne, had passed away long ago and the fortune of his family along with the house got into his possession.

He is Bruce Wayne, the 24th Wayne, the last one in his family. After his parent died of mugging and later he decided to become Batman. He’s been fighting crime for two years now. At 25 years old, in peak of his body, he is one of the richest man on earth with his own enterprises, the most handsome bachelor in America and the most wanted besides Batman.

But there is nothing important about all the intro because you already know who he is.

So there he is with his butler, Alfred Pennyworth in Europe at his great grandfather’ house with hundreds of little faces staring as he pass by, trying to make sense on why his great grandpa would collect all this creepy soulless things (that maybe some isn’t all that soul less when you look at their beady colorful eyes) and concluded that he was obsessed. After asking his butler about it.

He normally wouldn’t even care about some abandoned relic of the Waynes but the house is still in good condition and still got a long way from collapsing. Because of that he planned to open the house again and turns it into Abraham Wayne’s Doll Museum if there’s nothing it can do except collecting dusts and becoming spiders den.

So with hired helps and watchful eyes, he cleaned the manor off dust and crawlies and restored it to former glory of European structure in a week. Now it stands again as if never got abandoned and ready to be opened to public with more tweaking and labelling and shits they need at museums and searching for those dolls’ history or where they were made.

Unfortunately or fortunately depending that this is almost at the start of the story; he stumbled upon a secret passage after a little accident and much detective work after he saw some differences between the building structure and the blueprint and searching for the actual passageway. The door lay behind a tall knight’s armor with some kind of pull inside the helmet, revealing staircase down to some kind of basement

‘Too small to be Batcave, pity’ Bruce thought. There is a light switch that gave no indication of working. He reached into his pocket for his smartphone to use it as illumination, he descended halfway and almost tumbled down the remaining stairs when the wooden foothold give away under his weight. He treaded carefully on the last stairs down.

What he sees down there puzzled him.

There are some things that used to be a workbenches, some rusty old tools and two chests on the far wall. But there are also books scattered around the floor and tables, mostly showing machination, what looked like magick circles and weird symbols. He walks to the workbenches.

Parts of disassembled doll littered upon it, half made dolls, broken dolls, there is a stuffed purple bear with green and red button for eyes at the corner. As far as Alfred’s story goes, Abraham Wayne never made the dolls himself. 

Bruce went to the other workbench and his eyes widen. On this table some wooden dolls have gears inside them.

Robots, his ancestor want to make robots. There is no clue as to say that great grand succeed, so he exhaled slowly but getting into stance so that he prepared if some robots comes clanking from the dark and try to attack him. Even without the bat suit he can still fight a few measly moving tin can.

He waited for a little bit longer; when he’s certain that there will be no attack he finally come upon the chests. The other white and the other black. Some kind of puzzle mechanism he never see was preventing him from opening them.

‘Well, I am Batman...’ and he opened the white one first with pride, before his right hand was caught on the sharp corner of the chest.

“Fuck!” you might be Batman but surprise attack is still surprising when you least expected. A single drop of blood falls on top a single porcelain baby doll sitting inside. Bruce feels a little dejected that it was only a doll. He grabs it with his now forgotten bloody hand, smearing his blood on the porcelain surface. He turned it around in his hands. It seems to be an ordinary doll with green eyes and red mouth.

“Well this is disappointing...” Bruce sulked for a moment before he remembers the other chest. He turned to the other chest, but there is nothing, only thin air.

He looked down to the baby doll still in his grasp staring at him. 

Convinced that it wasn’t some kind of hallucination, he brought the baby doll and went back up to the manor.

“Master Bruce! Where have you been?” Alfred walked in. The secret door closes behind Bruce. 

“Here Alfred. I found this doll in this secret room” he give the butler a look at the porcelain toy in his hand.

“Oh my, is that your blood on that thing? What did you do, sir?”

“Oh it’s just a cut, Alfred. I’m going to treat it later. Is the bedroom ready?”

“Yes. It’s already cleaned and more habitable than before. Do you intend to sleep here, sir?”

“Yeah, call Jason and Tim that we will stay here for tonight and will head back tomorrow morning. Tell them to patrol carefully and to get away from the costumes.”

“As you wish, Master Bruce” with that, Bruce put the toy on a table and prepared to sleep.

 

HAHAHA

 

There are times when Batman doesn’t have to think about something, just lay back and relax. No chasing lunatics in the middle of the night, no stopping robberies, no gliding over the city like he owned it. For now he is just Bruce Wayne, gone to Europe to take care of business and a much needed sleep, something he really missed since he became Batman. He shut his eyes, hoping for a dream where he was happy and not his parent's demise.

Just as he started to fall under the Sandman’s spell, a sound like giggling startled him awake. The sound is not near, but close enough to be heard faintly. At first the billionaire thought it was a dream or something and relaxed back to sleep. Then there is a crash. And more giggling.

He jolted to stance, arms out in case of attack. He knew it! There must be some crazy robots around the house. Then there are more giggles and sputtering noises. His brow furrowed. Can robots giggle? Did he finally gone insane and now imagining things? 

This is not the time to question his sanity now.

Bruce creeps out of the bedroom, sticking to shadows. More giggling. It came from the study. He frowned again. It sounds like... Baby giggles...

Goosebumps rises on his arms and neck, cold dread filling him. He’s not usually a superstitious person, but when there is a sound of a freaking baby inside a house full of dolls when you know there isn’t one, well there must be an explanation for it.

His attention snapped when again a crashing noise again sounded. Bruce tried to relax when Alfred suddenly call out.

“Master Bruce? Is that you?” he sounded groggy, probably had woken up to the noise then, which also mean that he wasn’t dreaming all that. At the sound of Alfred’s voice, the giggling stopped.

Bruce opened the door. He can hear rustling of paper and what unmistakably a baby’s chirp.

“Oh god what...” Bruce turned on the light.

There is the baby~

End chapter 1

 


	2. Torso

2\. Torso

There is a naked baby on the table. It looks like a boy but Bruce can’t be sure, all babies look the same at first glance. It looked to be less than a year old, have big green eyes, milky white skin and… is that green hair? The baby got some fine green curly hair, the only normal skin color are its plump pink cheeks and pinkish red lips.

The baby turned around to stare at him, curious green eyes wide like a little puppy. Why is this big guy just stood around with his mouth hanging open like an idiot?

Bruce can see that it’s a boy.

The baby boy clapped his hands and giggled happily, as if reading his mind. Bruce is not sure how he should react. Being Batman usually prepared him for something unexpected from his enemy, not from a baby. He just stood there dumbfounded, unsure of what to do in this situation. 

The infant got bored and decided to crawl toward the edge of the desk, seeing that there is nothing more to be dropped.

Bruce snapped back to reality when he saw the baby looked down the edge of the table. He got to the table in two quick strides and prevented what will be a baby fruit punch. The infant giggled happily again and make grabby hands in the air.

“Master Bruce, is something the matter…” Alfred trails off when he see a baby in his master’s hold, struggling to keep the wiggling infant from getting out of his big hands. The butler corrected his employer’s hold so the baby ends up sitting in the crook of Bruce’s arm while his other hand hovered uncertainly behind the baby. They just stared at each other for a moment.

Alfred coughs politely while Bruce looks down at the little surprise in his arms, the baby sucked his own thumb innocently, staring up at them.

“It’s not mine…” Bruce muttered.

“I’m not saying he is, sir” Alfred said, looking at the baby and notices something. “Master Bruce! I think the little one might got injured before” the butler takes the infant from Bruce and inspected his back; there is a red spot in a shape of a J on his right shoulder blade, on the baby’s white complexion, it looked like fresh blood.

Baby J squirmed and outstretched his little hands to Bruce making grabby hands at him.

“Blurbsbr! Ahihhh!” he said.

“Oh? Someone is getting attached to you sir. It’s quite rare” Alfred chuckled and handed baby J to the little tyke’s savior.

“So I can assume that he is not mine or yours because none of us got green hair” Bruce said, taking the baby into his arms again.

“Or any other normal person, sir”

“Then we got no clue where this baby come from or who put him here naked. And how did they even get in in the first place?” Bruce regret not installing security cameras first.

“Should we take this baby to the police or you want to search the parent yourself?”  
“I think we should just leave this to the police. For now I’m looking after this kid” at this, Alfred raised an eyebrow.

“Pardon me, Master Bruce”  
“Yes, Alfred?”  
“Do you even happen to have any knowledge in caring for a baby?” 

Bruce hesitated, “You just have to feed them?” Alfred sighed again. The baby falls asleep sucking his thumb, “we should call him J” 

Alfred nodded, “it fits, sir”

HAHAHA

They tried to feed J after he woke up at 3 a.m. laughing and screaming like a banshee. Alfred made some blended apple and J tossed the bowlful of it into the kitchen counter, splattering himself and his caretakers, laughed the whole time he messed all up. 

They checked his makeshift diaper made of face towel and Bruce blanched and threw up in his mouth a little. 

They also tried to bath him in the tub at first. J tried to drink the soap, which was prevented, but he successfully squirted it in Bruce’s eyes. 

When the baby was bundled in warm blanket and rocked vigorously he did finally sleep. Bruce even played some music, for god sake! It’s a struggle to make him sleep again.

“Well that’s an understatement of the century, sir” Alfred, calm as ever, only cleaned the kitchen counter or wherever the apple juice landed.

Now here is Bruce with demon baby in his arms, in some mall with the latter still swaddled in blanket, gaining many stares from anybody passing by and happen to see them.

He goes to the clothing section first. Oh J also made choosing a clothes for him hell. The baby wanted to pick them himself. So Bruce holds him on the edge of the clothes’. Baby J throws every piece around, colorful onesies from pink to black flung aside until he found a purple onesie that he liked, cooing happily. It has grinning fishes motif and floppy fin ears. 

The staffs were giving them stinky eyes but can’t complain at the cuteness after the father put it on his baby. It somehow suit the baby’s green hair and his smile was blinding. The way his pink chubby cheeks bunched up to his eyes was adorable af. 

Bruce is feeling self-conscious. He is technically a celebrity and a bachelor but walking with a baby no more than months old. 

What if some paparazzis took photos of him and baby J? He never care for the articles and speculations. Even many women with babies that come up to him don’t faze the billionaire that easy. He can just admit that it’s not his child. But the media can get so crazy with stories and that’s only a nuisance to him.

J pulled him out of his reverie by pulling on his cheek, his other hand closing on his lower lip. Bruce looked down to his charge, see baby J smiling brightly, and his heart swell. He give a little smile of his own, adjusting J on his arms until he is satisfied.

Bruce can hear many voices cooing other than baby J and looked around. There are women and teenage girls giggling and waving at them some even take a photo with their cellphone. Bruce feels himself blushing then and walked quickly to the baby and kids’ section of the mall.

This place is full of assorted and colorful kids clothes, cribs, toys, supplies, and accessories. Anything to make everybaby happy and cutesy. 

J looks around the colorful displays on the window shops, eyes quickly darting towards a store full of toys. He wiggled, but the big man just keep walking by it, passing the shop completely. “Ba! Ngghyaaaa!” Baby J shakes his little arms, trying to get Bruce’s attention by hitting his dark head furiously.

“J! Calm down!” Bruce panicked when his little charge started screaming. His harpy voice an octave higher. People are staring at them, some in concern or pity, some look at him in suspicion, there is even someone covering his ears. Bruce isn’t so lucky. He tries to rock baby J but only succeeding in making him slip further down. He feels like J is trying to tell him something if his baby babbling is something that he could understand. 

Bruce put J down to the floor. He stops screaming. Bruce want to praise the lord at that time, but then the spawn of satan starts crawling in a speed no baby should have. It’s like he is a speed crawler or something; not in Spiderman way but baby crawl way, on his little hands and knees. He slips inside the toy store.

Bruce tried not to curse aloud while he make his way inside the store, trying to find a baby among stuffed dolls and toys. A clerk woman come to greet him loudly, approaching the tailored suits man over a parent with their child that came in first.

“Hello, sir! Welcome to Happy Smiles! We provides you with good to high quality of toys for your kiddies!” Bruce decides he doesn’t like this woman but he stayed with his Bruce Wayne persona. He flashed his playboy smile. 

“I’m sorry I seemed to lose my baby in here. Did you see him?” the clerk keep on chattering her teeth. Her wide smile scaring him a little.

“Oh no! I’m sorry I don’t see a kid except for the one girl with her parent over there. She pointed to little girl with blonde pigtails in black and red dress. 

“No, not a kid, a baby. Did you saw a baby? He wear purple and have green hair” at the clerk’s blank look, he shook his head “I will search for him myself”

Meanwhile, a certain baby is crawling further into the shop, green eyes wide with wonder. A giggle passes his lips as he looks around curiously at all the toys and stuffed animals. He found a teddy bear to play with before something else catches his eyes. A shiny toy gun on a display small table. Snow globes in many shapes surrounded it. He speed crawled to it. 

The toy sits on a table, not too high and low enough to reach if he stands up. Baby J failed to stand the first time, fell on his bum, then he tries again, this time using the table as support. 

He let out a triumphant “uh!” as he managed to grab the plastic toy.

That’s when his legs gave out, and the table along with all the toys on it toppled down when he brought the table covering down with him.

Everybody in the store turned at the sounds of glass breaking and clattering. Bruce raced towards the sound. He called little J when he heard a shrill laughter at the back of the shop. The clerk woman walk pass him and Bruce followed. Even the parent and their girl.

They all gasps. Broken glasses of what used to be snow globes surrounded a little baby in slowly soaked purple babygro playing with a toy gun, laughing happily. The clerk almost fainted, the parent looks horrified, the girl looks curious and Bruce quickly dashed to his little trouble. He could see blood coming out sluggishly on baby J’s cheek, when he checked for other injuries, there are also smaller cuts on his left eyebrow, frighteningly close to his eye, and a little one above the previous one. But it was the baby’s right cheek that worries him, it is deep; a straight line from the edge of his mouth almost to his ear. Fortunately not deep enough to need stitches. He also noticed a blue swelling on the forehead. The baby keeps touching the bumps, it is obviously bothering him.

Baby J keeps playing with his toy gun, chewing on the barrel and slamming it to the ground a few times, still giggling.

The parent urged Bruce to take his baby to the hospital to check for internal injuries. He thanked them, writes a check to the clerk to cover up everything that’s broken and rushed to nearest hospital with baby J’s laughs left behind.

End of chapter 2

**Author's Note:**

> First Batman fanfic. Before i update the next chap. Would someone kindly help in beta and inspiration and such? *tearyeyedpuppy*
> 
> Warning: not gonna update regularly coz I'm a lazy mofo and writer's block can be a bitch so yeah 
> 
> I promised to be better next chap. Love ya!


End file.
